Expectancy

It would be my discreet honor

To grow old

I could grow old

With the best of them

I could tromp through a locker room

Naked as the day I died

Saggy paunchy

Mottled as wet leather

I could neither love

Nor hate my body

But rather inhabit it

As though I always had

I could wear a small bird 

on my shoulder

Fearless

Knowing my bite

Would inflict greater harm

I could eat chocolate ice cream

Until Death promised me life

If I  would only stop

I could make the jokes

I already make

I could achieve something

Or nothing

& know that nothingness

Is more substantial

I could approach nothingness

With coy weariness

Rather than abject terror

I could embrace my imminent nothing

With eminent compassion

Like a grandchild

I would console nothing

With a purse of prescriptions 

I could know you a blip longer